Protection and support when you don’t feel safe

You deserve to feel safe

If you’re reading this because you feel afraid at home, or worried about what a partner or former partner might do, please know that you’re not alone and that help is available. You don’t need to have everything figured out before you reach out.

If you are in immediate danger, call 911.

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Family law has tools designed to protect you and your children. A court can make a restraining order when you have reasonable grounds to fear for your own safety or the safety of a child in your care. It can also decide who stays in the family home and make urgent parenting orders when safety is at risk. Help from the police and the criminal courts is a separate path, and we can explain how the two fit together.

How we can help

Elliot Wren handles urgent family court work and will take the time to understand what you’re facing. We go at your pace, and we can act quickly when you need us to.

• Restraining orders. We can ask the family court for an order that limits or prohibits contact with you, your children or both, and keeps the other person away from places such as your home, workplace or the children’s school.

• Exclusive possession of the home. If you’re married, we can ask the court to let you and your children stay in the matrimonial home while the other person lives elsewhere. If you’re not married, we’ll explain the other options that may be available.

• Urgent and without-notice motions. When waiting would put you at risk, we can bring an urgent motion – and in some cases ask the court to act before the other person is told about it.

• Parenting orders that protect children. We can ask for temporary orders about decision-making responsibility (what used to be called custody), parenting time and safer exchanges.

• Working with other supports. We can work alongside police, victim services, shelters and counsellors, and explain how any criminal case or peace bond relates to your family case.

• Help with legal aid. We’ll explain the free legal advice and support Legal Aid Ontario offers people experiencing domestic abuse.

How the process works

Every situation is different, and the steps depend on how urgent things are. Here is what usually happens. Courts treat safety concerns seriously, but timing still varies from court to court and case to case.

1. A confidential conversation. You tell us what’s happening, at whatever pace feels right. We ask about your safety first, then talk through your options.

2. Gathering your evidence. We help you prepare a sworn statement (an affidavit) describing what has happened and why you’re afraid. Texts, emails, photos, police reports or medical notes can help, but you don’t need all of them to start.

3. Bringing a motion. We file a request (a motion) asking the court for a temporary order. If the situation is urgent and giving notice could put you at risk, we can ask the court to hear it without notifying the other person first.

4. The court’s decision. A judge decides whether to make a temporary order. If an order is made without notice, the court will usually set a date, often within about two weeks, for the other person to respond.

5. Service and enforcement. The order is served on the other person, and police can enforce a restraining order. Breaching one can lead to criminal charges.

6. Moving forward. The temporary order stays in place while the rest of your case – parenting, support and property – moves ahead. A final order can be made later, by agreement or by a judge.

Common mistakes to avoid

• Waiting until things get worse. You don’t need to have been physically hurt to ask for help. A reasonable fear for your safety or your children’s safety can be enough.

• Deleting messages or records. Upsetting texts, voicemails and emails can be important evidence. If you can do so safely, save copies somewhere the other person can’t reach.

• Delaying advice about your children. If you’ve had to leave home, speak to a lawyer about parenting arrangements as soon as you safely can. Courts understand that people leave to stay safe, and early advice helps protect your time with your children.

• Relying only on a criminal case. Bail conditions or a peace bond can change when the criminal case changes. A family court order is a separate protection that can sit alongside them.

• Overlooking shared devices and accounts. Shared phone plans, cloud accounts and location-sharing apps can reveal where you are or who you’re talking to. Change passwords and check settings when it’s safe to do so.

• Treating an order as the whole plan. A court order is an important protection, but it works best alongside a practical safety plan.

Staying safe while your case moves forward

A safety plan is simply a set of practical steps to help you stay safe at home, at work and when you’re out with your children. It can change as your situation changes, and you don’t have to build it alone.

• Keep a copy of any order with you. Consider giving copies to your children’s school or child care and, if you’re comfortable, your workplace.

• Have an exit plan. Know where you would go, keep important documents and spare keys somewhere safe, and keep your phone charged.

• Keep required contact structured. If an order allows contact about the children, use a parenting app, email or a trusted third party, and keep a record.

• Arrange safer exchanges. Supervised exchange programs or busy public places can make parenting time handovers safer.

• Lean on support services. Shelters, victim services and 24-hour crisis lines can help you build a safety plan, whether or not you decide to leave.

• Tell us if anything changes. If an order is breached, call the police. Then let us know, because it may matter in your family case.

We can point you to community supports in York Region, and we will always put your safety ahead of any legal step.

What to do next

Reaching out can take courage, and you can go at your own pace. When it’s safe for you, call us at (905) 555-0142 for a free 30-minute confidential consultation. We can talk by phone, by video or in person, at a time that works around your safety.

Please call from a safe device – one the other person can’t access – and use one for email and browsing this site too. If you are ever in immediate danger, call 911.